Month: June 2020

June 7, 2020

Be Kind Out There

Inciting Violence Is Not Progress

The outrage is just. But violence? Shouldn’t we have flying cars by now and be communicating to each other via telepathic waves while in our Utopian communities? We’re still doing this? Hurting others, looting or destroying local businesses is like stabbing yourself in your own leg – you’re gonna have a hard time walking for awhile, and it’s a setback you could’ve avoided. My inclination is to assume that the majority of the people protesting are not there to flip over cars – but perhaps some got caught up in the social norms of the mob. Be smart. This is not what you’re about and you know this.

We Are All Important

And for those out there protesting for all good intentions – bless you to care enough and take action rather than frivolously posting famous quotes from MLK, Gandhi and others and sit behind a computer screen (like I’m doing now ;)). Stay strong and above those police officers who would choose to “Neglect and to unnerve.” Rather than “To protect and to serve”.

A woman in Omaha stands bravely and peacefully as police shoot projectiles and tear gas.

Peace Officers, Tell Us Your Stories

And if you’re one of the well-intended men and women of law enforcement who are in it for the right reasons and act with integrity, share your perspectives and stories and why you got into law enforcement to serve peace and protect others. We all want to know there are still some Frank Serpico’s out there – those who have integrity. I know there are good cops because they are my friends and family, literally. They are no Chauvin’s or Jonathan Silva’s who abuse their power, have no self-restraint or racist words or actions. So if you haven’t yet, share something that shows that you are not this picture of police brutality or racism that is being exploited at this moment.

Weed Out The Bad Cops

As for those “bad apples” in law-enforcement, let’s get cracking on them. Here’s some resources that could help you take action:

                 

Look up “Brady lists” : The name, taken from a 1963 Supreme Court ruling, Brady v. Maryland, these are lists that District attorney offices across the state keep of officers who have been identified as potentially problematic witnesses. The reasons that may include information about past dishonesty or other bad behavior of the cops involved in the case. But they’re not always complete and can miss cops who were hired after past jobs in other counties. This is our “Megans Law” list, if you want to stand in question of an officer in your area.

Look up Senate Bill 1421 : This gives the public the right to see certain records relating to police misconduct and serious uses of force. You can now request these records under the Public Records Act (“PRA”) — a law that gives the public the right to see the non-confidential documents of our state and local government agencies.

BLM Keep Going! Be Positive. Be Constructive.

So if you’re supporting Black Lives Matter and already doing what you can with your posts, great. And if you are taking a stance, go beyond words and do something, be a part of something that contributes to positivity. Like the organization Corporate Accountability. Take your resourcefulness, creativity and energy to contribute to a positive cause that is actually doing something other than violence.

As astrophysicist Tom Chi mentioned in a Ted Talk that knowledge and knowing, limits you to learn more. Because you’ve settled. In this context, having a point of view without considering new data is only going to inhibit an understanding of each other. But this is ok if you’re one of those who still think the world is flat. Uh yeah, don’t know what to say to you.

But if you believe in a flying cars and a Utopian Society, you can help make that possibility a reality.

Chris Escobar is a coach for introverts and also enjoys helping teams become efficient. He resides in San Jose California with his amazing wife Boom Boom, two almost-automous teenagers: Zolie and Evanusky, and sassy Bichon, Lola.

June 7, 2020

Do You, Do…You?

Have you ever tried to be someone you’re not? We’ve all done it. Maybe we’re trying to impress someone or fit in with a certain crowd. But in the end, it never feels quite right. Chris Escobar, a coach for introverts, learned this lesson the hard way. He tried to use buzzwords and phrases to impress a potential business partner, but it only backfired. In his own words, “I was being a tool.” The lesson here is simple: be yourself. It’s a lesson we’ve all heard before, but it’s worth repeating. And in Chris’s case, it’s a lesson he’s now passing on to others.

June 6, 2020

Time Tools

Regrets, Do You Have a Few?

Have you ever worked on a project, presentation or proposal whereby after it was completed, wished you had more time for incubating ideas or just time in general to properly complete? More importantly, wished you had spoken-up or reached out to the right people to make it better before the project was launched? I know I have, and ended up with the opposite feeling of why Jeff Bezos started Amazon: “Regret Minimization Framework”. He basically didn’t want to look back in his life and have many regrets. And back then, being a part of this Internet thing, to some, looked the same as investing in muscle pants in the 90’s (who knew that they only looked good when rocked with a well-coiffed mullet). But the framework that drove Bezos to start a near $3 billion-dollar business is simple:

Bezo’s Regret Minimization Framework he adopted

And what about you? Did you ever have regret that you didn’t take any action that would ultimately help all involved: you, your colleagues, partners, and ultimately, the company’s bottom line?

And how about those projects, presentations and proposals that you, your team or whole company had to revisit, after a launch, release, or an event? Did you learn anything or did you keep your mouth shut while you contribute to the Redundant Department of Redundancy in rebuilding, revamping and revising? Or perhaps you have your masochistic ways and enjoy the clean-up work with your bitterness and angst seeping through your body language, words and actions while wiping-up the mess.

Would things have been any different had you stepped in and been an advocate for everyone’s time? Could an email, talking to some key people or speaking up in meetings change the course of humankind?  Even if nobody listened to you, you would have at least achieved Regret Minimization. And Bezos would be proud – no, actually he would say, “hell yeah, sista!”. (And then you could say, “I told you so” to those you communicated to…nah! (But it would feel pretty good, right? 😉 ).

Yesterday Is Gone…Or Could Be Gone

When Sir Paul McCartney woke with a melody that came to him in a dream, the only lyrics he could put to it was:

Scrambled eggs, Oh my baby how I love your legs, Not as much as I love scrambled eggs…

Sir Paul McCartney Top Beatle

And that’s all he had for months and months. The song was considered a running joke between bandmates (and if you don’t know who I’m talking about yet, it’s The Beatles 😉 ) Each time the band got in the studio, Sir McCartney tried to convince everyone that he really wanted to record it. Once McCartney finally put together some solid lyrics and replaced “Scrambled eggs” with “Yesterday”, he was able to convince his bandmates and producer George Martin to record the song, which he did solo along with a string quartet. It was finally released in the US as a single in September, 1965. And yet the song was so different from other works by the Beatles that the band members vetoed the release of the song as a single in the United Kingdom.

Despite the differences, Yesterday became musical history and has even been voted as the best song of the 20th century in some circles. It also went on to be covered over 3000 times (as per this writing); those including great artists such as: Elvis, Marvin Gaye, Frank Sinatra, Liberace, and Joan Baez.

So bravo for Sir McCartney for pushing his work.

Do you have a “Yesterday” that you could have pushed to make great?

Some Tools For Your Utility Belt

Here are three tips to enable you to be part of the solution and help contribute to better outcomes when you see an opportunity to share:

  • DON’T THINK. ACT :
    Former NASA-rocket-designer-turned-leading-time-management-expert, Peter Turla said something in his course that I took from him years ago that stuck with me: “If you have to swallow a frog, don’t stare at it too long.” (Peter changed “swallow” to “kiss” to alleviate the thought of consuming a frog). This Mark Twain quote accompanied a rubber frog that Peter gave each of us. I kept it on my desk as a constant reminder to “Just Do It”. And it was an effective tool that kept on giving. So if you have something to say, just say it. And if you think it will come out wrong, you can always apologize to make it right. Just get it out. This is one atrophied muscle that needs to be pumped.
  • DON’T ASSUME EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT THEY’RE DOING :
    That’s the principle of Social Proof : Taking on a particular mode of social behavior that is loaded with assuming that everyone else knows what they’re doing (and they typically don’t). Consequently, you stop trusting your gut instincts. But by knowing this, you’ll likely ask questions and bring things up, which may also help others who have the same questions and concerns.
  • CHANGE SEATS :
    People get used to each other in a setting or meeting cadence, where they observe and learn behaviours of them. These basic survival traits don’t take long to get solidified so they can mentally prepare themselves for their surroundings. Break that. Change your usual seat in the conference room, sit in an alert and engaged manner and actively choose to be present to respond or react to subjects that yearn for your amazing insight. Break the team’s solidified folkways and let them know you are there to make a difference.

Don’t Be Scrambled Eggs

So be an advocate to your ideas and contributions by stepping up and giving them more time and considerations by: Acting, Not-Assuming and Mixing Things Up. Or you can just keep them as scrambled eggs where yesterday would be regret maximization.

Chris Escobar is a coach for introverts and also enjoys helping teams become efficient. He resides in San Jose California with his amazing wife Boom Boom, two almost-automous teenagers: Zolie and Evanusky, and sassy Bichon, Lola.

 

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